We knew this time would come: the era of beer bottles with “features and benefits.” When you’ve marketed the hell out of the stuff inside, turn to the outside — the candy coating, the get-up.


Budweiser has done just that with its limited-time “Make Your Mark” labels, which rock a small white area you can use to write whatever you want. Just use a coin, a key, or anything sharp. Because…pencil and paper are hard to find?


Not sure what problem Anheuser-Busch is trying to solve here. Were people trying to put sticky notes on their beer bottles, but the condensation kept them from sticking? Do that many people “misplace” their beer so that it needs an i.d. tag? Is this an effective way to count the number of “bottles of beer on the wall” so we don’t over imbibe?


As far as we know, neither the label nor the write-in area peel off so you can bring someone’s phone number home with you. So that’s not the big “aha.”


While we scratch our heads over this “innovation,” we’d love to hear how you use your Make Your Mark label — or how you don’t use it.


If bars were patroned by toddlers, this might be genius. They lose everything. But anyone over 21 should be able to both say what they need to say, and keep track of their brew.


Coming soon: a “smart bottle” that beeps when you clap so you can find it in a crowded room. (Kidding, but we wouldn’t be surprised.)