The sexual revolution solved many things. But it didn’t touch “who buys the drinks” with a ten-foot poll.


Everyone has an opinion about this one. observes, “Most of the heat comes from men who feel they’ve been suckered for long enough, and have sworn off buying women drinks forever. I’ve also encountered women who feel slighted if they go out and wind up paying for their own drinks. They’ll also contemptuously dismiss a date who doesn’t insist on paying the whole tab.” adds, “A lot of guys think that this is a great way to show affection to a woman without any of the emotional stuff. Or even worse, they think that, like opening doors and pulling out a woman’s chair for her, it’s what men are ‘supposed’ to do.


Guys think that if you buy a woman something then you aren’t revealing any EMOTIONAL weakness. And men tend to like that. We just don’t like seeming vulnerable. Okay, fine. But let’s think about this for a second: Pretend that someone comes and buys you a drink, and you have absolutely NO IDEA who they are. Maybe you’ve known them for a whole 5 minutes. Do you suddenly want to hang out with this person and get to know them?


Well, you may want to keep hanging out with them because they are buying you drinks, and hey, who doesn’t want a free drink. But you definitely aren’t too interested in getting to know them. Women feel the SAME way about this, only more intensely. When a guy buys a guy a drink, then guys see it as a genuinely friendly gesture. When a guy buys a girl a drink, then girls see that as wanting something in return.”


Undoubtedly, these days, women, more often than not, buy their own damn drinks. So today we submit that sarcasm may get you farther than gifting a girl a drink. Try this: “Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money.”