This is one of those things that we all think about, but one brave soul publicly asserts

(on Miami’s


Dave Jacobson, a former Miami bar owner, verifies that, yes, drink orders say a lot about a person. Some good. Some not so good. Here, we paraphrase:


Umbrella Drinks Or Ice Cream Drinks

Drinks with umbrellas and lots of garnish (cherries, oranges, pineapples) or those with contents on the rim are usually quite young. You don’t catch many guys drinking anything like this; it’s mostly college-aged girls.



If you’re in a Mexican restaurant eating chips and salsa, go for it. If you’re at your local watering hole or upscale bar or restaurants, skip it. It can seem to others — when ordering a margarita at the “wrong” location — that you are dull, living vicariously through your drink.


Whisky/Scotch On The Rocks

Your typical whisky or scotch drinker is someone who may have more than a few drinks a week. Appearance-wise, they are usually someone with facial scruff and often a bit heavier.


‘Original’ Martinis With Gin Or Vodka

Most people who order martinis are experienced drinkers. Many are older, but if they are young, they tend to know their way around a liquor cabinet.


Rum And Cola/Diet Cola

People who drink rum and cola don’t know to try anything else. They are not very adventurous in life.


Bloody Mary

The people who order Bloody Marys are mostly older ladies; often women who have seen a lot of sun. The other people who order them typically get them in the mornings, in an attempt to nurse a hangover.



Screwdrivers are hardly ever ordered. People who get these drinks are typically original thinkers. They are also people who don’t want to taste the booze in their drink.


Appletini, Choco-tini Any Fruity/Sweet-Tini

Women who are young, typically 21-24, are most likely to be seen with flavored martinis. They tend to like them because they are pretty and they carry them around as if they were accessories to an outfit.



The customers who order cosmos from me are typically bar flies. These are the people you see frequently, regulars who seem to like to drink a lot.



Right now, the only people I see ordering Manhattans are older men with gray hair and glasses. But that doesn’t mean that won’t change.


White Russian

Hipsters order white Russians. You’ll see guys with black hair, black-framed glasses and white belts drinking white Russians at many trendy bars across the country.


photo Originally posted: 8/30