“Yes, bi*****. It’s another Kardashian show. You love it.” – Khloé Kardashian, 15 seconds into the first episode of Kocktails With Khloé.
The newest addition to the Kardashian empire is an hour-long talk show hosted by Khloé. She intended it to be a glimpse into the dinner parties she frequently has with friends including special guests and fun games. But, much real like dinner parties, it’s only fun for the people in the room. Khloé tries her best to keep things moving – changing locations, starting up pre-planned games, asking questions to get under her guests’ skin – but it’s a tough hour to get through if you aren’t holding one of her signature cocktails in your hand.
In the first episode she was joined by Kym Whitley, Brandi Glanville, Aisha Tyler, Snoop Dog and her sister, Kendall (who is only 20 and announced “she isn’t allowed to” have any alcohol early on in the episode). Every time a new guest arrived, they would ring the doorbell. Then everyone in the house would scream like college girls at the bar who just heard the opening lines of “Shake It Off”, and Khloé would welcome the new guest in by announcing their full name and a brief summary of their work history. You know, just like a REAL dinner party!
The games helped to break up the forced conversation, but could not have been more uncomfortable to watch. The first was called ‘Swiper’. It was essentially Tinder on a television filled with pictures of celebrities who most definitely were not tuning in to watch. They all decided Cate Blanchet didn’t have enough meat on her, and Michael B. Jordan was super bangable.
Then they showed their ‘silly’ sides by having Kendall prank call her sister, Kim, to tell her that she’s pregnant. ARE WE HAVING FUN YET!? Kim handled it well, giving great advice to her sister that she thought was in trouble. When Khloé revealed that it was a trick and they were recording the call for the TV show, Kim seemed unphased. Probably because she was exhausted from taking care of her baby. That segment ended with us feeling bad for Kim and wondering why we were still watching this show.
After another awkward game and some forced discussion about everyone’s sex life, Snoop Dog arrived. Khloé asked him who killed Tupac as though after all these years she was going to be the one to uncover the truth. It would certainly have helped her ratings, but Snoop couldn’t answer. Then the women commended Snoop for giving up smoking while coaching a youth football team and talked about Straight Out Of Compton. That led to a discussion about Oscar Nominations and the tension in the room got to be a bit much for the fun and flirty Kocktail talkshow. Khloé broke it up by introducing a new game that included Snoop and Kym wearing wigs while acting out a recent Twitter fight between Nicki Minaj and Farrah Abraham (pictured above). It was here we learned that Snoop Dog’s impression of a woman is remarkably similar to our impression of Apu from The Simpsons.
It was a fun show if you’re into B and C list celebrities feeling uncomfortable around Khloé Kardashian. But Andy Cohen can rest easy knowing he is still the king of alcohol induced late night talk shows.