Florida Man Tries to Trade Alligator For Beer, Gets Cited.” If that doesn’t make you do a double take, what does? This dude in Florida walked into a convenience store with a live alligator and tried to trade it for a 12-pack of beer. For some reason, the clerk refused to trade and instead, got this industrious gentleman in trouble with the authorities.


Um, if this man had come into our imaginary convenience store and offered to give us an alligator, you better believe we would have taken him up on his offer. We would have even given him a 30 rack, but apparently he just wanted 12 beers, so that’s cool too.


Hearing the story of this failed trade attempt got us thinking about all of the other things we would gladly trade a 12-pack of beer for…


  • Homemade potato canon


  • At least 2lbs of a gourmet deli meat and/or steak


  • Bottle of 357 Mad Dog Hot Sauce


  • Subscription to the Bacon of the Month club


  • Wolverine claws (the movie, not the animal)



  • A real battle axe


  • A Ninja Turtle mask, more specifically, the Michelangelo Nina Turtle mask. It would be helpful if a pizza was included.


There are really a lot of different things that could get us to part with a 12-pack of beer, especially if we already owned a store that had plenty more beer for us to drink. If we ever open a convenience store, we’re going to call that alligator guy and ask him to come to our grand opening.