We’re not the type of people who need a reason to drink. If we’re breathing that’s reason enough. But for those who need more, here you go:
1. Steve Harvey: He hosted the Miss Universe pageant and then awkwardly announced the wrong winner. Some people think it was planned, others think Harvey should just stick to Family Feud. We like to spend our energy worrying about competitions where everyone wins, like drinking.
2. Post-Christmas Coma: As soon as the family is out the door, it’s time to drink and forget all about the the political fights you suffered through the days before. Grab a thirty rack and focus on the people you actually care about: fictional movie characters.
3. Odell Beckham Jr.: The wide receiver was suspended for one game due to an aggressive helmet to helmet hit. And it’s all happening just in time to destroy a lot of fantasy football finals. If you’re one of the many affected by his mistake, or if you’re just a frustrated Giants fan, calm your nerves with a drink and the memory of Super Bowls past.
4.Too Many Movies: Picking a new movie to see this weekend is nearly impossible. If your theater doesn’t promote movie hopping, you’re going to have to make a big decision. Or you could just wait until they all go OnDemand and spend the weekend sleeping off your holiday hangover.
5. 30 Rock: Sarah Palin rolled out a parody video this week where she plays Liz Lemon, John McCain plays Jack Donaghy and no one has any idea what is going on. Pour a beer and cook up some Cheesy Blasters to remember a time when television was still sacred.